Herrmitain

  Hi.. I know I missed to post on friday, I'm sorry about that.  A bit about me, I'm born and bred in a small country in Southeast Asia, Malaysia. I came from a small town in Selangor. Being a small asian person, with a great distance away from America, UK, and the west in general, I cannot help but being fascinated with the many things that came out of the west. One of the things that fascinates me is humans there.  We are of the same species, yet it seems the crimes committed in the west are sometimes far more egregious than I could have ever expected. One of those crimes is of Jeffery Epstein. I'm currently reading stories written by one of the victims, Virginia Roberts. If the stories are to be believed, I feel extremely sorry for Ms Roberts for having gone through them. Underage and taken advantages of by adults around her, using her body and compensating her with money when she could not have possibly understood the effects of it at her tender age. I'm halfway thr...

 Hi! I've been thinking to do 10 things posts that I'll update here once a week so I'll be posting four times in a month. The reason behind this are to keep my blog active, to keep me be more responsible in posting for making that promise to you guys, and to make sure I'm keeping these neurons in use. I've noticed that I tend to delete things that may seem unimportant to me, but are important to someone else. And thus, they may feel sad that I forgot things about them. I hope by keeping my brain more active, I would retain more information.  So, today's post is about 10 things that scares me. Let's go through the list.  1) Bears This is a legimitate fear as bears can run really fast. And those teeth can chomp me and unalive me quite quick.  2) Die by suffocation This would be an absolute fear for me. Lacking oxygen is scary enough, but asphyxiation? Dude, that'd be one of the most terrible way to go. 3) Open water Creatures of the deep are no joke. The s...

 I hope no one would read this blog. Ever. I use this blog to say things I would never say to anyone, because saying it could have impacted me perversely. So, it's better for me to keep what I want to say to stay hidden from other people's eyes or knowledge as it would benefit no one, at least at the point I'm writing this. Children. A huge gift for those who are able to negate it. A burden and a sin to those who are not able to, despite bringing them to this world by choice. A choice. Bringing a child into this world is definitely a choice. Chose to get married. Chose to make love. Chose to have a child. Chose to have more child. And another. And another.  What would be the reason why parents stop having children? Is it, I cannot financially support them anymore? Or is it I cannot be bothered to stay up at night looking after them, changing their diapers, feeding them, burping them, all those things young parents do? Or is it, I just cannot have another young mind I can sh...

 Just venting a little here. I love making food. Truly, I do. Making them, plating them, eating them. I love them all.  But there are just moments in my life where I just cannot be bothered to cook. And today is one of them. I feel like cleaning the kitchen is okay, but to cook? Honestly, I'm feeling a little drained of being cooped up in the house, cleaning, cooking, cleaning again, other house chores, and it just doesn't end. And the expectation is, I have to clean, cook, clean, cook, clean, cook, clean, cook, and I see no end to it to be honest.  I like cooking when I get input of what to make, being with me in the kitchen as a way of supporting me, and cleaning in turns. And there are days, I just want to order in. Just to feel like I get to skip cooking for a day. I know I order in before, but yeah, I don't know man. I can't say it, cause I feel like it's wrong. I know I get allowance every month, but man... I do feel it. The burn is here, not sure if it's ...

 Ramadhan tahun 2023 ni aku rasa macam syahdu sikit. Entah kenapa, mungkin sebab aku dah tamat belajar. Lepas ni, aku kena dapatkan lesen praktis baru boleh dapatkan klien. Dapatkan klien = dapat duit. Sebab sekarang ni, aku tak ada duit yang aku cari sendiri.  Teringin nak sewa premis pejabat sendiri, pampang nama sendiri kat depan pejabat, terima klien setiap hari, dan majukan perniagaan kecik kami. Harap dipermudahkan. Aku doa banyak kali pasal bisnes ni setakat berapa hari Ramadhan ni. Hari ni hari ke-3 puasa, 4 kali terawih. Kalau aku terlupa nak doa lepas solat, mesti aku doa dalam hati.  Korang tau tak perasaan dia bila rasa macam masa depan tu tak tentu? Aku tak confirm dapat klien setiap hari, tapi aku dah tau buat masa terdekat ni aku nak pakai perpustakaan yang baru diubahsuai tu jadi tempat jumpa klien. Tempat tu cantik dan murah. RM 6.00 je sejam, mana nak dapat? Huhu..  Korang, sesiapa je yang baca ni, doakan aku ya. Aku takut sangat nak maju ke depan, ...

    I've decided to do book reviews now. Deal with it as you please, sorry though if it doesn't measure up. Cheers!   This book has been sitting idly on the second row of my IKEA Billy's bookshelf since I bought it from BookXcess online store. It is my fault it has been there for so long, but I'm glad I bought this book. I didn't remember why I bought it, or any story line prior reading it.  When I first started reading this book, I saw a white lady's name, Holly Bodger. Imagine my shock when I read the first chapter and realized the setting is not in a western country, but an inspired land off of India. I always thought people would write about the things that are familiar to them, but this one is different. Or it's maybe my uninformed self that probably the author has plenty experience about India. The second thing that shocked me is that this story is a dystopian story, set in 2041. Most dystopian story I read or watched are mostly based in the US, UK, C...

 sebenarnya kan, aku tak kisah pun single.  but i have to admit,  it's nice to have someone fuss over you when you're sick. sekarang aku tengah demam, aku kena jaga diri sendiri punya makan, aku sendiri punya ubat. haha bukan komplen, cuma ni pemerhatian aku je.

Since the last post which was exactly 2 months ago, some things has been happening.  I started on a weight loss journey, by myself  I've lost 4.6 kg total  I gained some of them back and lose them again for the past couple of week Had a emotional low where I had to solicit advice from a friend  I always thought losing weight was easy, as the only thing you had to do was watch over what you eat and you'll lose the kgs. But, from what I experienced, the emotional battle within me was the hardest to face. Telling myself, if I quit I could eat whatever I want since I gained some of the weight back. Why keep at it when I plateaud, and even gain weight back? Tough questions to answer.  I know the answer is consistency and not giving up. But that is easier said than done. However, I want to come out the other side being 10 or 15 kg lighter. I want it. I will it. It will be done.  Hope's my next post will be more cheerful haha Here's hoping.   

Yesterday was the 2nd day of a little program organized by our company. A little get together to learn new skills that has something to do with assessment reporting, determining the best course of action after we have gathered some information in our helping process.   The class was wonderful. New friends are great. Old friends are even greater. We shared minds on what mistakes we did, how to improve, safe to say we're taking in huge loads of new information and trying to adopt these new standards for our own habitual practice.  Those are what I considered the highs of yesterday and the day before that.  But, the lows.  I ended yesterday with self-blame, grieving over my own appearance, with a dash of self-loathe. I was asked during Rorschach analysis whether I've never been happy about the way I look.      Caught off guard, I nodded and said yes.  When asked whether I wanted to be Cinderella.      I nodded and said y...

Hello! It's COVID-19 season again. I was a confirmed positive case on Sunday, 13th of March 2022. Just a little background story of how I caught this nasty virus. I'm currently doing my internship at a government agency. I'm not going to name names, but one of the workers there came to work a bit sick one day around a week before I got sick. I asked this person whether he or she is okay, and the reply I get was, "I've tested myself, and it was negative. So this is probably just flu". So, fast forward to Friday. I was attending a forum with students in the auditorium. I felt funny, like my throat was sore and I kept drinking water to sooth it but it worked for just awhile and then it felt sore again.  I thought nothing of it. For all I know, I had no close contact with anyone COVID positive. However, the next day, I felt feverish. I felt weak. I slept at odd times during the weekends. It was off. And my voice became hoarse, like a boy on puberty. It sounds ridi...

 Hari ni 9 februari dah. Aku masih kat rumah, menunggu surat terima untuk buat intern kat tempat yang aku dah mohon hari tu. Hmm.. takutlah tak dapat. Tapi, aku tau aku takkan give up awal. Jangan bersangka buruk orang kata. Okay. Aku taknak sangka buruk. Aku mesti boleh dapat intern kat situ. Jia you CK! Pastu kan korang, hati aku rasa berat je beberapa hari ni. Nak tau tak kenapa? Orang yang paling rapat dengan aku mungkin akan kawin tak lama lagi. Aku happy sangat untuk dia, sebab dia dah jumpa orang yang sayang dia. Tapi aku rasa macam nak kena tinggal. Aku sorang je tinggal nanti, tak kawin lagi, takde kerja betul lagi. Entahlah... Aku nak la tak sedih sebab kalau aku sedih nanti aku yang susah nak grow. Dia memang akan habiskan masa dengan pasangan dia la kan. Selama ni aku ada kawan. Lepas dia kawin, aku dah takde kawan dah. Mesti la dia letak lagi banyak komitmen kat pasangan dia. Habis aku macam mana? Tamak betul aku ni kan? 

 Hey you guys! Remember about the NGO I talked about a few posts ago? We're officially registered with ROS! Oh my god, I can't even believe it. Feels like it won't happen because we were rejected so many times. But it did! It has!  We successfully registered but have to make some changes. First, we rebranded our NGO from Feminita which has a really feminine name and may chase away potential male clients to something really public, simple, yet easy to remember. The new name is Persatuan Minda Sihat Malaysia (PMSM) or in English, I guess it would be Healthy Minds Association Malaysia or Healthy Minds for short. We've also started recruiting new members. Alhamdulillah, we scored a few more members since our registration. Most of our members are counselling students from Open University Malaysia, but we do not prevent those from other universities to join us too if they are interested in our programs and causes.    As for me, it's the first time something I did and foll...

 Hai semua, assalamualaikum.. malam ni plan asal aku nak buat tugasan. tapi nampaknya dah teralih perhatian ke sini. dah lama tak tulis apa-apa. aku tau blog ni pun tak ada siapa yang baca, tapi aku cuma seronok dapat tulis sesuatu di tempat yang bukan buku atau tugasan. haha beberapa bulan ni aku sibuk sangat. semester ni lagi banyak kerja nak buat banding dengan semester semester lepas. aku tinggal dua semester je lagi. nak habis cepat, tapi pada masa yang sama aku rasa takut dengan apa yang aku nak kena hadap lepas tu. ada temuduga siut nak jadi orang yang berlesen. adoi. nak lepas sem ni pun terkial-kial.  korang yang baca blog aku, tolong doakan tau. terima kasih korang. walaupun aku mungkin tak kenal korang siapa.   aku suka gambar ni, corak batik. aku harap korang suka jugak gambar ni heheh

Assalamualaikum, hai korang! aku ada benda nak update kat korang. baru-baru ni, aku terbukak hati nak join satu pertubuhan ni. NGO lah kiranya. nama dia Feminita. benda ni wujud sebab ada classmate aku dalam kelas kaunseling selalu consult dengan kaunselor power ni En Hairol Kamal nama dia. En Hairol ni borak-borak dengan classmate aku tu, pastu dia cakap la, kenapa you tak buat NGO? Pastu classmate aku cakap dia taktau macam mana nak buat. Sebab ye lah kan, kitorang kan student je. Mana lah terfikir nak buat NGO apa bagai. Pastu dia cakap, takpe saya boleh ajar macam mana nak buat NGO. sebab setakat ni tak ada NGO yang based untuk perempuan je kat Malaysia ni. classmate aku pun macam, cantik lah. classmate aku ni sebenarnya tak recruit aku pun. dia recruit classmate aku lagi sorang. pastu classmate yang lagi sorang ni yang recruit aku. first, aku macam nak join ke tak eh. macam skeptik sikit pun ada. ye lah, selama ni dengar NGO kat bandar-bandar je, pastu macam aku pun tak pernah ada...

 I'm doing something I've never done before. Hopefully this pans out well. Nervous, scared, but I'm not going to back down. 

 Hi, new social media app has entered the stage, and it offers connecting with people in audio instead of texts or videos. It's like podcast, but on steroid. And anyone can start a room. I kinda like it, but it's not an app that I go to to fill my time or when I'm consciously choosing to go on when I'm bored. I need to make an effort to listen in as the topics are kinda interesting sometimes. I can't say for everyone, but this app is 5 out of 10 if I have to rate it.   However, it is good that it offers a different dynamic to social media, as before you don't always get to hear someone's voice, but in here your voice is all you have. So, better be comfortable to talk if you opt to join as one of the speakers.  Recently, I joined Southeast Asian Group, Malaysian Group, and a few others. It's interesting to see how our world is actually so much bigger than we thought despite of it being more and more connected globally. In recognizing this, I applaud the d...

 I took my first AstraZeneca shot at WTCKL. My appointment was quite late, thankfully Sunway Putra Mall was open and I get to eat a bagel so I wouldn't be too hungry while waiting.  I saw so many people that day. So, to those naysayers that say people don't want to get vaccinated, we do. But the vaccines aren't available to us yet. Until such time, don't repeat those crap about we don't want to get vaccinated. Just encourage people. And tell them, thank you for waiting.  A few complaints though, 1. The application could've gone way smoother if the server wasn't shit. The first was a nightmare. Now I've heard from people applying for the second batch and third, it was also shit. Do something bruh. You got 70 mil for shit servers? 2. Vaccines for older people first. Right now, I've seen a few instafamous or celebs got jabs. I wonder how did they jump que? Are they frontliners? They're not even older than me so how tf do they get jabs first?  Other ...

  Hai,   orang Malaysia mesti dah tau pasal benda ni. MCO 3.0 akan dijalankan bermula 12 Mei 2021 sampai 6 Jun 2021. 12 Mei tu sehari sebelum raya. Benda ni dimaklumkan kat rakyat guna file PDF. Tak ada pengumuman gempar kat TV, tak ada sidang akhbar, tak ada angin tak ada ribut, tiba-tiba satu Malaysia diumumkan MCO. Macam majoriti orang kat twitter, aku berkongsi pendapat yang sama. MCO 3.0 ni takkan berkesan. Sebab apa? Sebab kalau korang update dengan jumlah kes lepas PRN Sabah, korang akan nampak yang majoriti kes adalah daripada sektor perkilangan atau industri. MCO 3.0 ni SOP dia lebih kurang sama dengan MCO 2.0, dimana sektor perkilangan atau industri ni tak akan ditutup. Bayangkan, kes mencanak-canak kat bahagian tu, bahagian tu jugak la yang dibiarkan bukak. Yang kurang impak macam uptown, bazar aidilfitri, bazar ramadhan, pasar pagi, pasar malam, sekolah, semua dia nak tutup. Siap kubur pun dia kuncikan sekali, tak boleh ziarah katanya. Entahlah wei. Aku rakyat bias...

            This is my new night light! Cantik kan? I love it so much. Has seven colors in total, and the brightness is adjustable. Definitely in love with it.

 Black mold is apparently dangerous if left untreated especially for people with respiratory issues. Luckily, after googling I found that it can be eradicated using Mr Muscle for Mold and Mildews. I've sprayed it once, and the mold stain has reduced significantly. I'll spray it again later, since the smell of the spray already overpowers the room. I'll keep spraying them until all the mold are gone. The spray smell also stays on my fingers. I might need to use gloves next time. Anyways, if you have black mold problem, might want to use Mr Muscle.    p/s: This is so totally not an ad for Mr Muscle. But I appreciate if they want to sponsor me. :D  After the mold is gone, I'll prep the wall for a new coat of paint. I'm thinking Cobalt Blue? What do you guys think?