Aunt's note: 8th May 2023

 I hope no one would read this blog. Ever.

I use this blog to say things I would never say to anyone, because saying it could have impacted me perversely. So, it's better for me to keep what I want to say to stay hidden from other people's eyes or knowledge as it would benefit no one, at least at the point I'm writing this.

Children. A huge gift for those who are able to negate it. A burden and a sin to those who are not able to, despite bringing them to this world by choice. A choice. Bringing a child into this world is definitely a choice. Chose to get married. Chose to make love. Chose to have a child. Chose to have more child. And another. And another. 

What would be the reason why parents stop having children? Is it, I cannot financially support them anymore? Or is it I cannot be bothered to stay up at night looking after them, changing their diapers, feeding them, burping them, all those things young parents do? Or is it, I just cannot have another young mind I can shape, for these I already have have maxed me out? 

For I believe, even then, even more so now, a child that misbehaves is showing how their parent parented them. The rules. The things they can get away with. The discipline or lack of it. I truly do not mind a child that is not as smart, but I cannot stand a child that is rude. Why do they need to be rude for? Unmet needs? Are those needs even considered something they truly need, or is it created by the 'false need'? I have never seen anyone dies of boredom. One could always entertain themselves even if there are nothing in front of them. 

 For I am not responsible for this. This person is not my child, even if they are my flesh and blood. If a distant aunt is whom they seek, it is the person they shall get. 

Heartbroken aunt,

CK. 

A day moon